She’s having fun with me.
I let her have her way.
We’re walking us around,
watching people who won’t ever know
It’s my love’s first time
blowing bubblegum with a boy’s mouth
standing slightly taller,
really enjoying a cigarette
writing it all down on paper.
She’s acting like she’s studying
maybe she is a little bit,
this book isn’t exclusively a prop.
There’s a work of a kind getting done
we engage her conscienceless
body language and coincidences.
A vacant thread of attention,
sending chemical messages into the water,
our eyeballs watch it happen.
Hair strung out as an indicator of obvious preoccupation,
too scared to stare into each other’s faces,
then all of a sudden we’d need words
instead of bubbles of immaterial longing.
I’m pressing into the table,
licking my lips and enunciating
as your signals land ever so lightly.
I taste them and they dissolve
straight into our imaginarium
I hear your voice
it makes my skin blush…
you watching me seemingly fuck the paper
I make authoritative movements
gesture myself to stage front
without doing so much as talking,
not even looking your way to disturb your view of me.
I want it to haunt you,
how your mind gets it this easy,
yet I remain unapproachable even as some dork walks up to me
gets me to say hi, no, and fine.
You can’t even get to hello
I’ve swallowed every available word
to keep us on this level,
totally naked and abstract
our minds fuck like ballerinas on strings
I’m shaking with the thrill,
knowing how you wonder
could you really have me?
You doublecheck every thing you know
with another look you’re sure
you’re irretrievably lost in lust.
You give me even more
your head drops to the books
you no longer care to look at
all that matters anymore is what I’m doing now.
expert fingers on a throttle you can only dream of touching,
I engage and speed licks her lips
the room is reduced to the sound of transaction
people walk in and out dizzy on the contact rush.
You don’t even drink your coffee.
You’ve fallen almost asleep.
I’ve spent all your worry for today.
Just listen to the footsteps
the sound of the cash register
people moving into place.
They fade into nothing
in this place where we screw.
They talk about skiing destinations
some lady is talking on her phone
I get louder
we make her sneeze with the imagery
You get up to pay for something
I can’t make out what you’re saying…
something about your hands,
a quick reality check,
You go for a magazine
always fingering a rubber band in your hair
the static knob on a wave generator.
You’ve gone and made the line secure.
continuing series of sensuous
fixation terrorists in alt vault trompe position.
a guessing game now.
am i grossing you out with what I’m doing to my bubblegum?
you get up
you start throwing candy hearts into the garbage can.
now you’ve dropped one.
That’s the one I’ll steal if you leave before me.
isn’t it brilliant like this,
given each other nothing but a sense of wonder?
what exactly ARE we doing
licking each others brains like this?
I love you.
I love you silent and crazy
now I have to leave to keep my make believe.
You’re so perfect in my mind, my